Cleansing the Aura of Past Sexual Partners


As we move through adulthood from one relationship to the next, the aura of what was left behind is something most people would never think about. The toothbrush, cell phone charger, and feelings your past partner left you with probably top the list of what engulfs your mind after a breakup. What about their energy? Does this leave with them and their personal belongings?

Unfortunately, no.

The energy left inside you, your spirit and aura has now been shifted. This is true for both male and female but I believe this is a more powerful process from the female perspective. I say this because we are built to ‘receive’. Therefore during sex we also receive more energy. Hence, females are typically more emotional by nature as well.

If your are not familiar with aura or energy transfer and just not sure if you believe it, let’s explore this from another perspective. Have you ever walked into a room where an argument just occurred? You didn’t see or hear the argument, but can you feel it? This is energy … frequency, which we are not only made up of but also surrounded by. The frequency of the room has been shifted.

During sex, you and your partner exchange frequency. The more you are with this person, the more you absorb this energy. If your partner is having a bad day, negative thoughts, positive thoughts, admiration of love and so forth, there is an energetic transfer taking place. Good, bad, positive, negative, whatever the moods and emotions are … you now hold a piece of them.

You also hold a piece of them literally speaking as well as energetically. In recent research scientist have found the baby’s DNA as well as fathers DNA sticks around in our womb after childbirth. This is extremely interesting to me because when I was a child I remember telling my mother how many couples who had been together for many years, began to look more and more alike.  If this research holds true, there must be energy to accompany the DNA.

Luckily the steps to cleansing the aura are simpler than removing DNA. I have found with personal clients, the hardest part of this process is the buried emotions that may emerge from partners long forgotten or that you would like to forget. Once the cleanse is completed you will find your physical body may feel lighter, head space clearer, heart healed and a self awareness that is priceless. If you are in a current relationship I highly advise doing this cleanse together and refraining from sexual intercourse until the two step cleanse is complete.

First Step:

  • Grab a journal or notepad.
  • Burn an orange candle (for the sacral chakra)
  • Write down each name of past sexual partners. This includes same sex partners or if there were any molestation or rape in your past.
  • Begin with the first partner of your life and move forward from there.
  1. Answer these questions (skipping questions 1 & 2 in a non-consensual situation:
  2. Why was I attracted to this person?
  3. Why was this person attracted to me?
  4. What emotions did I walk away with?
  5. What emotions did they walk away with?
  6. What did I learn?

Second Step:

This process may be done in a time-frame lasting one day to a few weeks. I suggest completing the process in no more than 30 days. You may decide to complete one person a day or several. It really all depends on the emotional trauma as well as time. This is not a process to rush through. Be completely focused on the task at hand with no interruptions, stay in the now while also reflecting on the past.

  • On a small scrap piece of paper write down your ex-lover’s first name.
  • Burn the name with the flame from the orange candle.
  • Pay close attention to the smoke.
  • Lie down, place hand on the sacral chakra (two inches below belly button) *If doing this with a current partner, allow them to place their hand here as well.
  • Visualize that same smoke that came from burning their name with the candle.
  • Say to yourself, your body and your mind, “I release the aura and energy of______.”
  • Imagine that smoke rising from underneath your hand.
  • Lay here for 5mins or so.
  • If any intuitive thoughts or visions come to you, write them in your journal.
  • Repeat these actions of the step 2 process until all names have been released.

If you are in a long term relationship doing this together along with conversation about each partner, questions and healing will provide an immense amount of new found unity. It may be difficult at first. Neither of you have hearing about past partners high on your list of quality time together. This will change your mind. You will gain an understanding of your partners programming, patterns and actions. Learning that we take pain from one situation and apply it to the next, usually as a defense mechanism. With this new found knowledge and cleansing you can help guide and care for each other. If you are in a relationship or single enjoy your born again ‘virginity’.

About the author:

drmelissacarver203x203Melissa Carver specializes in Metaphysics, guiding her clients through the art of manifestation with one-on-one webinars and in-person sessions. Melissa is also a graduate of the Chopra Center University, completing her certification in the Perfect Health: Ayurvedic Lifestyle program. She and her husband, Leo Carver, are the core of Holistic Life Sciences, providing the Chopra Certified Ayurvedic Health Course throughout the state of Kentucky.

Melissa also received her PH.D. in Philosophy, with a specialty in Metaphysics from the University of Sedona.


97 Comments Add yours

  1. knoksiesa says:

    Do I light a separate candle for each sexual partner if there is more than one? Or just one for all??? I’ll await response. Thank you


  2. Faith Booker says:

    I really need help trying to get over a bad relationship so please help me


  3. Kristina McManus says:

    Can I ask…Does.this have to be people that you only slept with on one or a few occasions? Or is it only people you have been in love with?



    1. Nikole Edie says:

      This is for anyone you have had any sexual contact with.


  4. VH says:

    Nice article.
    Thank you.


  5. Sarah Beth says:

    What if you do not know every name from your past ?


  6. Zee says:

    I had many partners in past, and I don’t remember their names, what shall I do in this case ?


  7. Gina says:

    Its a nice idea, but very naive.
    Its good to do the exercise on your own. But if you have to do it with partner, onlycite the most recent relationship or any older lovers whom have had a significant imprint on your life…so that you show your present lover your intent to release any ties to prior relationships..especially those for which you may have shared formative life experiences with…

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Gina says:

    Its a nice idea, but very naive.
    Its good to do the exercise on your own. But if you have to do it with partner, onlycite the most recent relationship or any older lovers whom have had a significant imprint on your life…so that you show your present lover your intent to release any ties to prior relationships..especially those for which you may have shared formative life experiences with…


  9. Kalice Daley says:

    When you Say Burn the Name does that mean write it on the paper and burn the actual paper with the Orange candle Fire and can you write all the Names On one piece of Paper or you need I do each name seperately and burn them?


  10. Kamil says:

    What if you don’t remember the name of the person?


  11. Diana says:

    What if you don’t know the names of the first lovers of your previous sex partners? An alternative solution please?


  12. Caylee Tatum says:

    I have a question. What does it mean when I burned the name over the fire and the smoke was light but spreading wide and all lightly blowing into my face and chest area? I know that this is rare with smoke and wondering what the significance is relating to that person.


  13. Dee says:

    What if you don’t remember their names?


  14. Alana says:

    A wonderfully insightful and helpful article. Thank you so much for sharing something so important.


  15. Julia says:

    I’ve been living really not respectful to myself with a lot of drinking drugs and like more than 80 sex partners that I don’t remember the name of or even the look. How can I get free from that energy? Much love


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